Arachnophobia – quite possibly the most common of phobias and enough to bring even some of the biggest and bravest of men to their quivering knees. Love them or loath them, one thing is certain, they make great cast members to any horror movie.
During the nifty-nineties, we we treated (or not, in a lot of cases) to Arachnophobia, A movie that preyed on these innate fears and gave people, the world over, that skin-crawling sensation that our eight-legged friends induce so well.
Now, thirty-two (wow, I feel old) years later and the iconic title is set to hop aboard the recent remake train and once again instil raw fear into the masses, demonizing the fuzzy fellas for a further three decades to come.
What we know about the Arachnophobia Remake
The details about the long-awaited remake are as concealed as the spiders living in your home right now. Sticking to the darker recesses of press disclosure, any information surrounding the Arachnophobia remake are sat poised and ready to take us by surprise when the time comes – just like the aforementioned spiders you so unwittingly live with.
However, through the thick cobwebs of media concealment, we can just about discern a few vague hues of solid fact.
The great Steven Spielberg (whose production company, Amblin Entertainment, produced the original) will be co-producing the remake and will be joined in the ranks by the illustrious James Wan, while original director, Frank Marshal, will be leading the production team as executive producer.
That’s pretty much all that’s known about the illusive details. Sadly, you could probably fit what we know on the back of a postage stamp (you can’t, we tried).
What we would Like to see in the Arachnophobia Remake
A quick visit to Google Avenue tells us that the original movie paid host to over 300 real spiders. Disturbingly, we also learned that a large quantity of said spiders were squashed for sound effects. It was, apparently, only when someone forgot to turn the mic on that they ran out of sacrificial soundboard spiders and ‘resorted’ to squashing mustard packets instead.
Why tasty condiments only came into the equation after the spiders is beyond us, but we can only hope this is more hearsay than actual fact.
Regardless of the fate of the spiders, CGI would have been opened the original movie up to a whole new world of inventive ideas that stretch beyond the random scurrying of arachnid hordes.
Over the past thirty-something years CGI has improved in leaps and bounds. Hopefully we will see it used to its full modern capabilities and with an imagination not too far beyond the boundaries of realism.
A Jeff Daniels Cameo
To recognize a cameo actor in a movie is to be on the receiving end of a knowing wink and nod. Jeff Daniels played a blinding performance as arachnophobe, Ross Jennings. It would be nothing short of poetry if they somehow subtly blended him into the cast. Maybe he could play the part of a spider expert, to mirror his counterpart’s overcoming of his deep-seated fear.
Pace, Pace and Pace
As great as the original Arachnophobia eventually was, there was a point where it went beyond the realms of being a slow-burner and instead served up a generous helping of eye-rolling, yawn-inducing tedium.
The remake needs to have far more pace to its narrative if it’s to hold the modern-day audience for any length of time. Build-up was often favored over pace in those bygone days but, as Bob Dylan once famously said, “these times they are a-changin'”.
Arachnophobia Remake – Summary
If the movie causes as much of a stir as it did the first time around, it’s going to do well at the box office. Technologically, we have come so far since the first movie scared whole nations witless, and a lot more can now be done to add to that. A good use of CGI would open the potential for some great scenes, but overdo it and it could spell a disaster.
There’s no real release date, but as soon as we know, so will you.